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By Helene Abrams | Contributor Summer camp can be one of the most rewarding, unforgettable experiences in a child’s life. Camp provides children with a community of caring mentors who provide experiential education that leads to self-respect and appreciation for life. All of the outcomes—friendships, overcoming challenges, staying healthy, and… The post Why Should My […] More
Sheryl Lilly Pidgeon | Publisher and Editor-in-Chief, Goodlifefamilymag.comWho doesn’t love a celebration? But make no mistake – a celebration is most rewarding after plenty of hard work and determination; and the tougher the task at hand, the sweeter the success. Now, as we toast to our 10th anniversary, the GLF team and I look back with a lot to celebrate. We have gone out on a limb in every aspect of our lives but, like Mark Twain famously said, “Why not go out on a limb? Isn’t that where the fruit is?” I can say with conviction that I have never worked (professionally speaking) as hard on anything as I have on Good Life Family and GoodLifeFamilyMag.com. I have invested my heart, mind and resources into making GLF a PUBLICATION WITH A PURPOSE. We have grown, we have gained momentum, and we are making a difference. In the new year, you will see some big changes coming to Good Life Family. We are fine-tuning a new logo and re-branding to include a broader take on the word family because we know that the role of parenting often includes aunts, uncles, friends, etc. When we launched Good Life Family back in 2015, most of our core team was navigating life with middle schoolers. Now, those tweens and teens are in their 20’s – some are married and planning families of their own. So, we are growing up too. We will expand our voice to include younger parents, babies and toddlers, and grandparenting advice, while still providing entertainment and travel resources for all ages, more of our money-saving hacks, work-life balance strategies, and so much more. In addition, we are looking to incorporate your voice more. We want our readers to weigh in with their thoughts and tips for other families going through this journey together. We are working on a virtual Town Hall-style gathering of the minds. We also plan to help younger voices get heard. If your kids are budding writers, illustrators or photographers, please let them know we welcome their talent. We also plan to launch a global book club and add a Points of View forum on new movie releases. To join us on our mission to educate, inspire and motivate positive change, reach out to Paige Jackson, our Marketing and Content Manager, at Paige.GLFmag@gmail.com. As a publisher and founder of Good Life Family, I want to take a moment to toast my amazing team of professionals – editors, proofreaders, managers, writers and designers, four of whom were there from the beginning. Thank you for sharing my passion to make a difference in the lives of others by giving of your time and talent. I also want to thank our clients, our promotional partners and advertisers. Without you, we would not be able to do the important work we cherish. As a mom, there is no greater celebration than the health and happiness of my adult children, Bryce, 26, who married his longtime love (they started dating as freshmen in high school!) Daria, who we whole-heartedly welcomed into the flock, Jaxie, 25 and Lindsey, 23. Each of them have “flown the nest” and are thriving in their own journeys. Although I traded valuable time with them to embark on the GLF journey (balancing family and work is a non-stop challenge for most of us, and a consistent topic in our pages), the upside of that trade is that my kids are witnessing first-hand the passion that goes into creating something worthy of celebration. In fact, they always found ways to pitch in to help or cheer me on. I am grateful for their support and sacrifice and for giving me the best job title in the universe: mom.As a daughter, I am reminded that being part of the “Sandwich Generation” – those of us sandwiched between raising our kids and supporting our own aging parents – is both challenging and rewarding work and that each day needs to be celebrated.Finally, no celebration is complete without amazing friends. We celebrate the peaks (boy, do we!), but more importantly, we are alongside each other in the valleys. Deep friendships are built brick by brick and fortified by the test of time. As I’ve continued to grow as a person (much of that growth attributed to the wisdom of our experts for over a decade in Good Life Family!) and define my life in the “empty nest,” I have found countless opportunities to welcome new friends into my orbit. I have found that meeting a friend at this point in my life often feels like an instant connection, one that is easy, honest, transparent, soulful, like you’ve known this person forever – or wish you had – and I am going to cherish these relationships as they continue to grow and develop in the years to come. Similarly, now that I have more work-life balance, I have found the time to reach out to and welcome back old friends, some from my early childhood, who had remained in my heart, but life took us apart geographically. Spending time with these amazing friends is a true celebration of the term life-long.I’ll toast to all that!Wishing you and yours a new year filled to the brim with health, happiness, love, peace, and plenty of “Cheers!”-Sheryl More
By Tanni Haas, Ph.D. | Contributor
Every parent of teens knows how difficult it can be to get through to them, but it doesn’t have to be this way. There are many things parents can do – and a couple of things they shouldn’t do – to get their teens to listen. Here’s what the experts suggest:
Give Good Reasons
Teens like to know that their parents are taking them seriously, so if you want them to listen, don’t just state your opinions or tell them what to do. “Tell them why those are the right opinions,” says Rachel Ehmke of the Child Mind Institute. Give good reasons for what you say, and for what you say they should do.
Allow Time For Processing
It can take days, even weeks, for teens to process the substance of a conversation, especially an important one. If your teens don’t understand what you say at first give them some time and space to reflect on the conversation before you bring it up again. “You might be surprised how your conversation evolves over time,” clinical psychologist Dr. Gregory Jantz says.
Rephrase Statements as Questions
Teens will reflect more and better on what you’re telling them when you rephrase statements as questions instead of commands. “By asking questions,” says Josh Shipp, the author of The Grown-Up’s Guide to Teenage Humans, “you as a parent are getting your children to think critically on their own.” Try to ask questions that make your teens reflect on the causes and consequences of their actions.“Stop talking before your teen tunes out.”
Keep It Short and Simple
Keep it short and simple, says therapist Mendi Baron: “If you’re going on and on, your teen is thinking, ‘I got the point already, please STOP.’ So, stop talking before your teen tunes out.” This is difficult advice to follow. As parents, we like to unload whatever is on our minds but doing that can easily backfire.
Don’t Lose Your Temper
Don’t lose your cool, even if your teens are rude or aren’t paying attention to what you’re saying. If you lose your temper, the conversation can escalate into a shouting match. Remember that you’re the adult and should be better able to control your emotions than your teens. Instead of losing your cool, Ms. Ehmke says, “count to ten or take some deep breaths before responding.”
Don’t Lecture
“If you lecture,” Mr. Shipp says, “your teen tunes you out. And when that happens, you become the boy who cried wolf. You could have the most pertinent information, but your teen won’t hear a thing you say.” Also, a lecture is a monologue where only you get to talk and not a dialogue between you and your teen where both get to speak.A lecture is a monologue where only you get to talk and not a dialogue between you and your teen where both get to speak.
Don’t Use Judgmental Language
“No one likes to feel judged,” says professional counselor Trudy Griffin. “If you come off as critical or judgmental, your teen may shut down.” Try to say what you want to say in as neutral a way as possible. When you “remove judgmental phrases from dialogue with your teen,” Ms. Griffin adds, you’ll be surprised by how much more they’re willing to listen to you.”
ABOUT THE AUTHOR:
Tanni Haas is a Professor in the Department of Communication Arts, Sciences & Disorders at the City University of New York – Brooklyn College. MoreBy Christy Monson and Heather Boynton; Authors of Stand Up to Sexting as featured in goodLIFEfamilymag.com Experts estimate that at least 40 percent of teens are involved in sexting in some way. [1] Wait, so this is an article about . . . sexting? Absolutely! And if you have kids or work with kids, you […] More
Help us stuff a bus! Donate to those in need and join DART Friday, Dec. 6, from 6 a.m.-5 p.m. at SMU/Mockingbird Station for its annual Stuff a Bus event. Stuff A Bus is a DART employee initiative that benefits North Texas families and individuals in need. The event compliments two separate DART employee-sponsored drives – Santa Cops and Comforting […] More