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    5 Things to Say When Someone Dies

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    By Family Features | ContributorWhen someone you know loses a loved one, finding the right words can be difficult. A bit of compassion goes a long way and knowing the right thing to say matters.According to funeral professionals who guide families through loss daily, the approach matters.Here are five thoughtful things to say when someone dies, based on insights from spokespeople from the National Funeral Directors Association (NFDA), which represents funeral directors who support families every day during the grieving process:“I’m here for you.”Offering your presence, whether to listen, help with daily tasks or just sit quietly, lets the grieving person know they are not alone.Funeral director Allyse Worland says, “Do more listening and less talking. I am still here for you, even after the service.”“Tell me about your loved one.”Inviting stories and memories honors the deceased and helps keep their spirit alive.“Tell me about your loved one,” funeral director Stephen Kemp said. “What made them special? Positive stories are always helpful.”“What can I do to support you right now?”Rather than a vague “let me know if you need anything,” this question encourages specific offers of help, which can be easier for someone in grief to accept.“Offer actual support instead of just saying ‘sorry’ or ‘thoughts and prayers,’” Worland said.“It’s OK to feel whatever you’re feeling.”Grief is a uniquely personal experience that can evoke a range of emotions. Validating those feelings removes pressure to “be strong” or “move on” too quickly.“Sometimes you don’t have to say anything,” funeral director Camelia Clarke said. “A hug or touch says it all.“I don’t have the words, but I am here for you.”Sometimes, words fall short. Acknowledging this honestly while offering your presence can be deeply comforting.“Your presence and ear are what they need,” Kemp said.Funeral directors caution against common but unhelpful phrases such as “They’re in a better place” or “At least they lived a long life,” which may unintentionally minimize the bereaved’s pain.“Less is more,” funeral director Daniel Ford said. “Sometimes, a ‘hi’ and a hug or handshake is enough.Families and friends leaning on the expertise of funeral professionals who guide families through planning meaningful services and providing ongoing grief support is encouraged by the NFDA.Offering free resources, Remembering A Life helps families honor their loved ones and navigate grief. These include planning guides, grief support tools, creative activities and checklists.For example, the planning guide helps families organize a meaningful tribute, whether traditional or smaller memorial gatherings. The initiative also offers free printable resources such as “30 Simple Ways to Remember a Loved One” and therapeutic coloring sheets designed to support the grief journey.“Sometimes, just being present and listening is the most powerful support you can offer,” Worland said.Visit RememberingALife.com to learn more about how to support a grieving person and access additional resources. More

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      Pop the Cork on 2025!

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      Sheryl Lilly Pidgeon | Publisher and Editor-in-Chief, Goodlifefamilymag.comWho doesn’t love a celebration? But make no mistake – a celebration is most rewarding after plenty of hard work and determination; and the tougher the task at hand, the sweeter the success.  Now, as we toast to our 10th anniversary, the GLF team and I look back with a lot to celebrate.  We have gone out on a limb in every aspect of our lives but, like Mark Twain famously said, “Why not go out on a limb? Isn’t that where the fruit is?”  I can say with conviction that I have never worked (professionally speaking) as hard on anything as I have on Good Life Family and GoodLifeFamilyMag.com. I have invested my heart, mind and resources into making GLF a PUBLICATION WITH A PURPOSE. We have grown, we have gained momentum, and we are making a difference.  In the new year, you will see some big changes coming to Good Life Family. We are fine-tuning a new logo and re-branding to include a broader take on the word family because we know that the role of parenting often includes aunts, uncles, friends, etc. When we launched Good Life Family back in 2015, most of our core team was navigating life with middle schoolers. Now, those tweens and teens are in their 20’s – some are married and planning families of their own. So, we are growing up too. We will expand our voice to include younger parents, babies and toddlers, and grandparenting advice, while still providing entertainment and travel resources for all ages, more of our money-saving hacks, work-life balance strategies, and so much more. In addition, we are looking to incorporate your voice more. We want our readers to weigh in with their thoughts and tips for other families going through this journey together. We are working on a virtual Town Hall-style gathering of the minds. We also plan to help younger voices get heard. If your kids are budding writers, illustrators or photographers, please let them know we welcome their talent. We also plan to launch a global book club and add a Points of View forum on new movie releases. To join us on our mission to educate, inspire and motivate positive change, reach out to Paige Jackson, our Marketing and Content Manager, at Paige.GLFmag@gmail.com. As a publisher and founder of Good Life Family, I want to take a moment to toast my amazing team of professionals – editors, proofreaders, managers, writers and designers, four of whom were there from the beginning. Thank you for sharing my passion to make a difference in the lives of others by giving of your time and talent.  I also want to thank our clients, our promotional partners and advertisers. Without you, we would not be able to do the important work we cherish. As a mom, there is no greater celebration than the health and happiness of my adult children, Bryce, 26, who married his longtime love (they started dating as freshmen in high school!) Daria, who we whole-heartedly welcomed into the flock, Jaxie, 25 and Lindsey, 23. Each of them have “flown the nest” and are thriving in their own journeys. Although I traded valuable time with them to embark on the GLF journey (balancing family and work is a non-stop challenge for most of us, and a consistent topic in our pages), the upside of that trade is that my kids are witnessing first-hand the passion that goes into creating something worthy of celebration. In fact, they always found ways to pitch in to help or cheer me on. I am grateful for their support and sacrifice and for giving me the best job title in the universe: mom.As a daughter, I am reminded that being part of the “Sandwich Generation” – those of us sandwiched between raising our kids and supporting our own aging parents – is both challenging and rewarding work and that each day needs to be celebrated.Finally, no celebration is complete without amazing friends. We celebrate the peaks (boy, do we!), but more importantly, we are alongside each other in the valleys.  Deep friendships are built brick by brick and fortified by the test of time. As I’ve continued to grow as a person (much of that growth attributed to the wisdom of our experts for over a decade in Good Life Family!) and define my life in the “empty nest,” I have found countless opportunities to welcome new friends into my orbit. I have found that meeting a friend at this point in my life often feels like an instant connection, one that is easy, honest, transparent, soulful, like you’ve known this person forever – or wish you had – and I am going to cherish these relationships as they continue to grow and develop in the years to come. Similarly, now that I have more work-life balance, I have found the time to reach out to and welcome back old friends, some from my early childhood, who had remained in my heart, but life took us apart geographically. Spending time with these amazing friends is a true celebration of the term life-long.I’ll toast to all that!Wishing you and yours a new year filled to the brim with health, happiness, love, peace, and plenty of “Cheers!”-Sheryl More

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      Why You Should Give Your Kids an Allowance

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      By Tanni Haas, Ph.D. | Contributor

      Experts agree that an allowance can teach kids important money management skills, like how to save for things they want, how to budget their money, and how to choose between competing spending goals. Personal finance expert Brad Munson says an allowance “is a great way to teach kids about the real value of money, how to be organized and responsible, and how to plan for the future.” Financial counselor Ray Martin, who’s the author of several books on money management, adds that an allowance is a great opportunity for kids to experiment with money and to learn from their mistakes. “It’s a way for them to learn big lessons with small amounts of money at an early age.”

      It’s important that you talk to your kids about the value of money, and it’s best to do so in the context of an actual allowance. Certified financial planner Marty Allenbaugh says that talking to your kids about money without giving them an allowance is like trying to teach them how to play the piano without ever letting them sit at the keys.

      Research shows that giving kids a regular allowance while discussing with them the importance of money makes them more financially responsible as adults. They become, as personal finance expert Evonne Lack succinctly puts it, “less likely to arrive on your doorstep years from now with a duffel bag full of dirty laundry and a mountain of credit card debt.”

      If an allowance is such a great tool for teaching kids money management, at what age should you start giving them one?

      Many parents start at age 8, but experts agree, as Mr. Martin puts it, that it’s the kid’s “aptitude not the age that really matters.” So how do you know if your kids are ready to receive and learn from an allowance? Research shows that they are ready to benefit from an allowance once they have reached certain developmental milestones, like 1) understanding that money can be exchanged for things they want, and 2) they can confidently add and subtract.

      And, here, kids differ widely. While some kids reach these milestones at age 4 or 5, others get there by age 8 or 9. “So if your child tends to shrug at money, losing it before it can find its way to his dusty piggy bank, hold off until you see signs that he enjoys saving it or thinking about how he might use it,” says Mrs. Lack.

      Finally, but not least importantly, what amount should you give your kids?

      Experts agree that, as a rule of thumb, you should give them $1 per year of age on a weekly basis: for example, a six-year-old would receive $6 a week and a ten-year-old $10 a week. The advantage of this approach is that kids get an automatic raise every birthday, eliminating the question of when their allowances will be increased. If you are really lucky, it may even reduce sibling arguments, because the younger kid will understand why the older siblings get more.

      Parents should feel free to deviate from this rule of thumb depending on whether they live in an expensive or inexpensive area, their particular financial situation, how many kids they have, and which regular expenses they or the kids are expected to pay for. As Susan Borowski, the author of “Money Crashers,” puts it, “If a straight $5 or $10 per week (or even per month) makes more sense to you than paying a dollar per year of age, then pay what works for you.”

      If your kids are very mature, you can discuss this issue with them and reach a mutual agreement on a reasonable amount. It’s useful to go through such a process with your kids, says Mr. Martin, because it “helps to develop budgeting skills, teaches responsibility, and prepares them for the realities of personal money management.”

      The allowance shouldn’t be too high. If you give kids too much, they won’t learn how to budget and allocate money because they never get a chance to prioritize among competing spending goals.

      However, the allowance shouldn’t be too high. If you give kids too much, they won’t learn how to budget and allocate money because they never get a chance to prioritize among competing spending goals. Ron Liebler, the author of “The Opposite of Spoiled: Raising Kids Who Are Grounded, Generous, and Smart About Money,” says to “give your kids just enough so that they can get some of what they want but not so much that they don’t have to make a lot of difficult trade-offs. Let them own those, so they know what it’s like to make financial decisions that resemble grown-up ones.”

      Whatever amount you ultimately decide on, make sure to follow a consistent schedule and stick with it – whether weekly or monthly. As child psychologist Dr. Mary Kelly Blakeslee says, “random payments will be frustrating and confusing, and will reduce the opportunity for learning.”

      Editor’s Note: Click Here for insights on how you can help your kids maximize their money management skills.

      ABOUT THE AUTHOR

      Tanni Haas, Ph.D. is a Professor in the Department of Communication Arts, Sciences & Disorders at the City University of New York – Brooklyn College. More

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      That’s a Good Question! Podcast Episode 8: How dangerous is it to use steroids?

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      Donald Hooton, Jr.

      The course of your life can change directions in an instant. In July 2003 and in his senior year of college, Donald Hooton, Jr. was preparing to start a career with his business degree. That’s when he got the call from his sister that their 17-year-old brother Taylor had passed away. What shocked their family the most was that Taylor had committed suicide. All of the family had just one question. Why?

      It was the detectives who found the steroids in his room. At that time, the Hooton family didn’t see the connection, but they’ve learned. They’ve learned about steroid use and its psychological effects, and the link to suicide. And they learned the use of steroids is likely far more pervasive than you ever imagined.

      In the midst of their grief, his family could never have predicted how, through their tragedy, they could impact the lives of so many others for the better. Now Donald works every day to honor his brother’s legacy at the helm of the Taylor Hooton Foundation, the nonprofit started by his dad, Don.

      In this important podcast, you’ll hear directly from Donald, Jr., and learn about how he is helping turn his family’s tragedy into triumph for families across the U.S. and abroad.

      Donald thinks about his brother every day. “I hope he’s proud of the work we’re doing and what his legacy has become and how many lives have been saved,” he says. “I hope every time his story is shared it’s making a difference.”

      The Taylor Hooton Foundation is the leader in education on appearance and performance enhancing drugs. To learn more or to schedule an ALL ME® Assembly Program at your child’s school, visit www.taylorhooton.org or www.allmeleague.com. More

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      That’s a Good Question! Podcast: Episode 7

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      In this episode, we visit with Dr. Shanna Garza the Clinic Director of Girls to Women and Young Men’s Health and Wellness, an Adolescent Medicine practice in McKinney, Texas.

      Dr. Garza received her B.S. in Biology from Emory University and attended medical school at Baylor College of Medicine. Following her medical education, she completed a Family Medicine residency at John Peter Smith Hospital in Fort Worth. She is a board-certified Family Medicine physician with over 13 years of experience working with children, teens and young adults.
      Eating disorders are a health issue Dr. Garza’s clinics contend with on a regular basis.  There are a lot of societal issues impacting the way young people, especially girls, see themselves and judge themselves. Preoccupation with food, body weight, and shape may signal an eating disorder.
      What is the risk of dieting to young people? Is there a difference between an eating disorder and disordered eating? How does social media, diet talk and body shaming lead to eating disorders? 
      Dr. Garza shares important advice for parents to help our kids navigate this very dangerous and even deadly health issue.  More

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      That’s a Good Question! Podcast: Episode 6

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      That’s a Good Question! Podcast: Episode 5

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      That’s a Good Question! Podcast: Episode 4

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