Evelyn Reynolds

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    Coping Skills For Stressed Parents

    Parenting can be rewarding yet riddled with anxiety and stress. From the moment your child enters the world, nothing will ever be the same again, and neither will you. It is an emotional rollercoaster with all of the ups, downs and loop-the-loops you can think of. But unlike a rollercoaster where you can see the track clearly in front of you, life as a parent is simply not something that can be predicted or anticipated.  Parenting is a wonderful blessing but it comes with stress. That is why I am happy to share some coping skills for stressed parents. Stress management techniques are essential for parents to keep a healthy state of mind and function at their best.
    What Is Parenting Stress?

    Part of being a parent is being able to juggle a million demanding and important things all at the same time. This pressure can start to become stressful after a while, especially if it is not managed effectively. Parents are just human after all, and when it feels like all you do is run around and put out a number of ‘’fires’’ all day, it’s time to reassess your stress levels as a parent.
    If you are feeling tired, overwhelmed, mentally, physically and physiologically exhausted and the thought of cutting yet another piece of toast into a cheesy triangle makes you want to lie in a dark room and listen to the tap drip – then you will be delighted to know two things: One, you are not alone and two, it is possible to alter the amount of parental stress you are experiencing every day.
    Why Does Stress From Parenting Happen?
    There are many different causes of stress, and in most cases, there is not one clearly identifiable cause, but a mixture of subtle factors working in unison. Listed below are some examples of why parenting can be so stressful:
    1. A newborn: For new parents – especially during the first 6-12 weeks with a newborn baby – the exhaustion, frustration, inexperience and momentous changes all contribute towards massive parenting stress. Sleep deprivation is often the biggest culprit in the scenario, but after the first few months, new parents get into the swing of things and life as a parent becomes more manageable.
    2. Single Parenting: Single parents are constantly under pressure and huge parental stress all the time.  And depending on the resources and help they have available to them, it may be difficult to manage the huge amount of stress they have. But people love to be needed, in fact they have an inherent need to be needed, and the biggest lesson a single parent needs to learn, to help them manage their stress, is to be able to ask for help.
    3. Busy lives: A hectic schedule and no time to relax is one of the most common precursors to parenting stress. As is the case for most parents, they might have all the love in the world for their child, but fall victim to the intensive daily routine, the lack of sleep and the isolation.
    4. Insecurity: Very much a modern cause of parenting stress is a parent’s insecurity over their own suitability as a parent, and the significance of their own actions in regards to the child’s future. With exposure to aspirational parent lifestyles in the media and societal pressure, parents often obsess over every tiny detail and let almost anything run them into the ground.

    Stress Management Techniques For Parents
    Stress is a very real and debilitating part of every parent’s life and if left unchecked, it can start to unravel to the point where the parent suffer from a lower emotional well being. Stress management is something that takes self-discipline and assistance, and parents need to understand that asking for help shows signs of maturity and strength. Being proactive enough to say “I can’t do this on my own” and getting the help and support you need, is not a sign of weakness.
    Recognizing that parental stress is problem and searching for stress management techniques is the first step.
    Set Boundaries And Get Help
    Routine, clear family boundaries, help from other family members and quality family time, will keep your family team strong and healthy, and will reduce the stress levels significantly. If one parent or both parents feel like they are slaves to a demanding family who never help – and even 3 year olds can pick up after themselves – the stress levels are going to be high. Ask for help if you need it (in an assertive way, not an aggressive way). Or hire help if you can.
    Open Communication
    Sometimes it is just a matter of feeling seen and heard. Talking about how you feel stressed with your partner may be a great way to vent some steam and even come up with constructive ideas together for how to reduce trigger points.
    It is a good idea for parents to take time to sit down together and work out a game plan for where they feel the big stress areas are and how they can work together to manage them. In this way they are able to implement change using a process that involves the whole family.
    Take Quiet Time And Plan Ahead
    Part of effective parental stress management techniques for parents is planning ahead and being organized. Staying up an extra half an hour to pack school lunches or iron shirts, will greatly enable parents to feel less chaotic, rushed and frantic when schedules are tight and everyone is always feeling like they are running late.

    Coping Skills For Stressed Parents
    There are many different coping skills for stressed parents to help reduce stress and feel better.  Some parents turn to alcohol as a coping mechanism and that merely masks the stress and often makes the problem worse. Finding healthy coping methods is key!
    Be Grateful
    Check your mindset. Does it need an adjustment? You are blessed to be a parent and lucky to have someone you have to make dinner for. I am not saying to ignore your stress, I am just saying to remember what is important to you and that it may take some work to provide for your family. It is natural and normal. Sometime adjusting your expectations and being grateful for what you have is the first coping skill you need to employ from your tool kit.
    Take Some Time Out
    Parenting is often an unbalanced affair, with the parent giving so much of themselves to the child. Parents need attention too. Some parents can recharge their batteries better through time alone to pamper and think. Others need social time to with other adults to feel more connected. To address this, the parents should set aside time where they can reward themselves in a way that works for them.
    This could simply be an hour of relaxation, a dinner out, a massage or a movie. Listen to some music and dance or meditate. Try different things and see what you need. You can’t pour from an empty pitcher. Self care is not optional.
    Find Your Tribe
    A parent should never feel isolated. Indeed, isolation can cause stress in itself. Local community events that give parents the opportunity to communicate with others are important so they can see others are going through a similar stage. You are not alone and you will get past this stage. It is good to talk with family and friends, but speaking with other parents who can directly relate to your problems can be even better.
    Exercise
    Getting exercise is shown to reduce anxiety significantly. If you have pent up stress or anxiety, go for a walk or a run. How does it work? According to the ADAA.org, “Exercise and other physical activity produce endorphins—chemicals in the brain that act as natural painkillers—and also improve the ability to sleep, which in turn reduces stress. Meditation, acupuncture, massage therapy, even breathing deeply can cause your body to produce endorphins.”
    A Counselor
    A qualified counselor can help you address trigger points and solve patterns that are creating stress. A few sessions could help put you back on track handling things in a more productive, happier way.
    This Too Shall Pass
    Remember when raising kids, that it is all moving and changing as you pass through the different ages. The first two years are a tremendous time suck but they are also so special and wonderful. Each age will have its demands and rewards.
    As your children get older, relationship building becomes important for strong ties and emotional connections, which in turn helps to promote a healthy family environment and eliminate the build up of stress and associated family problems. The more effort that is put into the family relationship, the better the chance is for a happy and loving future.
    Conclusion
    Suffering from parenting stress is completely normal. However, working to develop stress management techniques for parents is also completely normal and a great way to deal with things before they get out of hand. I hope you find these coping skills for stressed parents useful. Enjoy these special years as they pass quicker than you think!
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    Importance Of Writing Skills For Your Child

    Along with the math problems and biology lessons, it is vital for each young child to master his or her own mother tongue and ability to communicate clearly. Even if the child is born and grows up in an environment where their particular language is the official one, children will still need a lot of practice to improve their writing skill abilities. Especially when it comes to developing good writing skills.  The importance of writing skills should not be overlooked because they are the key to clear communication. Good writing skills will help a child do well in school and likely in their chosen career as well.
    Whereas talking comes naturally and reading is somehow easier, acquiring writing skills requires a lot of practice as well as the proper instruction. As a caring and loving parent you can contribute to your child’s quest in becoming a good writer. It is helpful to remind your child of the importance of writing skills and encourage them to practice though creative writing prompts. If you enjoy their written work, show them and they will naturally put more effort into their writing skills.
    The Importance Of Writing Skills

    Good handwriting skills, both in print and in cursive, are just the beginning or developing good writing skills. Handwriting is important is conveying your meaning and also to show effort put into a document. If an adult handed you a document with the handwriting shown above you may wonder about the acuity of what you were about to read.
    The importance of developing good writing skills goes far beyond just handwriting. It is about being able to present ones ideas, whether it is a story or an argument, with a clarity of vision and purpose. The importance of developing good writing skills can’t be underestimated. From writing one’s college entry essay, to writing a letter to a loved one, to writing up a business proposal, there are so many uses of writing throughout life and so many reasons to want your writing skills to be strong.
    As the National Writing Project puts it, “writing is a complex activity; more than just a skill or talent, it is a means of inquiry and expression for learning in all grades and disciplines.”
    As Stanford’s President, John Hennessy (a computer scientist and electrical engineer) once said, “[In college] we had a notion that engineers had to know how to use slide rules or calculators or computers but not how to write. And that is the biggest falsehood you could possibly perpetrate on young people. I think writing and rhetoric — public speaking — are the two most valuable skills across any discipline in any field.” Whether you are a secretary, or a doctor, a retail manager, or a field biologist, writing matters. The importance of developing good writing skills is one that will pay off both in school and in the real world as you must be able to express yourself.

    How To Improve Writing Skills With Creative Writing For Kids
    There are certain things you can do at home, which will definitely help your children to improve writing skills.
    Place Value On Writing
    Ask your child to contribute with making up shopping lists, birthday and holiday cards, notes to friends, taking telephone messages, preparing invitations, making a dream board, etc. Writing for real purposes makes the child feel important and relied on. This will help him/her see that there really is an importance of developing good writing skills.
    Age Appropriate Writing Activities
    Start with the age appropriate writing activities from an early age and move into creative writing kids will enjoy as they get older. Let them write their own storybook. The importance of developing good writing skills is certainly a priority in your child’s education and you can help them learn to enjoy writing.  You may also want to reward their efforts to show them it matters.
    Expand Vocabulary
    Talk about new things that have been encountered during the day. Discuss what was smelled, heard, tasted, etc. Help your child expand his/her vocabulary. Expanding their vocabulary and ability to describe details is like giving them a wider arsenal of words to use in their writing.
    Provide An Example
    Let your child follow your example. Be both a teacher and a role model in creative writing kids will enjoy. Try to be seen writing more often. Provided that you are never seen writing, your kid might assume that writing is a tedious activity that only happens at school. Write memos, letters or even fridge notes. Read aloud and make corrections. This is in support of the necessity for revision. Try some creative writing prompts and develop stories that your kids will enjoy listening to you read and be impressed that you wrote.
    Aid Kids With Creative Writing Ideas And Process
    Offer and provide as much help as possible. Discuss the creative writing ideas they have and give them useful hints. Guide them through the process by pointing out both the dos and don’ts. Assist them in completing their school writing tasks. Discuss what ideas they have and with just a little help you will discover what your child wants to say (write) but and help them find the right words. Additional help must be provided especially when it comes to punctuation and correct spelling. Be more of a helper than a critic. After all, your aim is to help, not to discourage and a child could be easily discouraged if criticized too much.
    Provide Writing Space
    Provide your kid with a personal writing space, something like a study of his/her own. Even a small table in a quiet place of your home, preferably next to a window, so that s/he could daydream and think of nice creative writing ideas.
    Writing Tools
    Encourage your son/daughter to write, by giving them fine presents, associated with writing. Here are some examples of presents that will encourage writing: pens and pencils of different colors, a desk lamp, paper for writing (again, choose ones with different colors), booklet for a daily journal, a certain dictionary (or a thesaurus for older children when they are seeking for the right word).
    Creative Writing Prompts
    Do not demand, but rather encourage frequent writing. There are times when the child might have an inspiration, and others when there is no inspiration at all. Be understanding. Try providing fun journal prompts and creative writing questions that will encourage their imagination.
    Praise Helps Improve Writing Skills
    Focus and emphasize on the writing successes, not the flaws. Praise your child’s good work and refrain from being harsh on him/her because of the errors. However, do comment on and correct the errors.  Make writing interesting. If you have more time to spend with your child, assign him/her certain topics to write about, but stick to things that are of his/her interest, something s/he is interested in and fond of.

    Ernest Hemingway once said, “It’s none of their business that you have to learn to write. Let them think you were born that way.” The more you write, the easier it gets and the better you become! When you child understand the importance of writing skills, they will naturally want to become a good writer. There are many ways inspire children in writing and I hope you enjoyed these ideas.  Which ways for how to improve writing skills, do you think your child will take to the most?
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    Read This When Times Get Tough

    When times get tough, it can be hard to keep going. Here are some motivational tips to help you get through the tough times and help you keep on going till you thrive again.  I will also share my favorite inspirational quotes for tough times. Breathe, read this, and take things one day at a time.
    When Times Get Tough
    When you’re up against what feels like insurmountable circumstances it can be tempting to toss your sneakers in your gym bag and walk off the field.
    Giving up is easy. Life isn’t.
    But you’re smart. You’re hard working. Your friends, spouse and kids respect you. And everything you have, you achieved because you’re a determined, bright and confident person.
    You knew that, though, and it’s still not any easier to cope with what you’re up against. Maybe you lost your job, someone close to you fell ill, or it’s just one of those weeks—or months—when the little things keep piling up until the proverbial camel’s back is dangerously close to snapping.
    If telling yourself that this, too, shall pass isn’t enough to shake the negativity, you need to take some action. Here’s how.
    5 Motivational Tips For Going Through Tough Times

    Take care of yourself
    Not even Michael Phelps can tread water forever, and trying to keep your head above the surface while life keeps tossing waves at you can get you feeling like a pretty terrible swimmer.
    In fact, it can convince you you’re just a downright terrible person.
    When things get hard, you get depressed. That’s natural. And when you’re depressed, it’s a lot more difficult to find the motivation to do even the simplest things like cook a healthy meal, style your hair, or change into something that can’t double as pajamas.
    But do them anyway- walk, run, exercise, go for a bike ride, lose weight if you need to, get out there and experience life. Nutritional expert Isabel De Los Rios has countless stories of mothers who felt like the world was crashing down on them, only to turn it all around through putting themselves (and their health) first.
    Eat. Get some sleep. Take pride in your appearance. Maybe it sounds like added stress, but it’s the physical and emotional boost you need to stay afloat through this. So first and foremost, take care of yourself!

    Count your blessings
    Literally. Gratitude is powerful. Make a list of everything good in your life—the big stuff, the little stuff, the silly stuff. If it makes you happy, put it on your list. Your kids, spouse and home are probably no-brainers. Your dog? Cat? Iguana? Throw him on there, too.
    And don’t forget your grandma’s amazing lemon icebox recipe; your wedding photos; the way your daughter’s head smelled when she was six months old.
    Anything that has brought you joy, anything that you’re grateful for, put it down on paper. Don’t be afraid to get crafty and glue some photos or trinkets on there, too. Then, hang it somewhere—like the fridge, or your office—so you can glance at it now and then and remind yourself that life is wonderful no matter how awful it may be right now. 
    There is always something to be grateful for and sometimes it is easiest to focus on the small details.  The cool pattern the walls of the tent make, the way the sun pokes around the clouds, the pretty color green of new buds.  Those type of details sometimes pull me into the present moment when I am getting lost in the past.
    Gratitude can also help place things into perspective. Whatever is tough for you right now may be small in comparison to all the good you have in your life or how much it will really matter in a year’s time.
    Relax. Now!
    The worst thing to do to yourself when you’re overwhelmed is add weight to an already unbearable pile. Most of us think that staying busy is the best way to distract from whatever obstacle we’re up against, but knowing when to hang up your cape and let someone else fight the battles is a really crucial skill to overcoming adversity.
    If you don’t power yourself back up with ten minutes of deep breathing a day, you’ll lose your mind. No matter what you’re facing, there’s always time to give your mind and body a few minutes of peace. So take a walk, a bath soak, a nap or meditate. 
    I particularly find the below Wayne Dyer meditation music helpful for relaxing. It helps me recenter.
    [embedded content]
    Take out the trash
    On the opposite side of that same coin, find a constructive way to handle all your negative energy. Maybe your finances are a puzzle you can’t seem to solve, or your marriage is in a rut. Or maybe your son just brought home a bad report card. Whatever’s filling you with angst, find a useful way to drain it.
    My suggestion? Declutter your room. Or your garage. Your basement, storage shed, or under the guest room bed. Wherever unwanted crap piles up in your home, attack it.
    This constructive use of excess energy will keep your mind off whatever issue happens to be monopolizing your mental energy, allowing you to revisit it later on with a fresh set of eyes.
    Plus, getting rid of some of the crap in your life is always uplifting.
    Practice some altruism
    Whether you offer to babysit the neighbor’s kids while they’re at a movie, or offer up your time at a soup kitchen, find a way to help other people out with absolutely no gain for yourself.
    Look, when things feel too big to manage, a new perspective can shrink them back down to size. If you feel like you can’t fix whatever’s beating you down, fix something else. Reminding yourself that you’re a competent, compassionate person might be the jumpstart you need to get out of whatever rut you’re broken down in.
    One bonus tip?
    Look in the mirror and smile. Smiling can actually trick your brain into happiness!  Besides, you don’t want to forget how to smile.
    I am also going to share a few of my favorite when times are tough quotes to help inspire you to to, “just keep swimming.”
    Inspirational Quotes For Tough Times

    “Courage doesn’t always roar. Sometimes courage is the little voice at the end of the day that says I’ll try again tomorrow.” -Mary Anne Radmacher
    “Believe in yourself, trust your gut, surround yourself with resilient people who inspire you to be better and work hard.” -Monique Hicks
    “Conflict is growth trying to happen.” -Harville Hendrix
    “When one door closes another door opens; but we so often look so long and so regretfully upon the closed door, that we do not see the ones which open for us.” -Alexander Graham Bell
    “Tough times don’t last, tough people do.” -Robert Schuller
    “You need to spend time crawling alone through shadows to truly appreciate what it is to stand in the sun.” -Shaun Hick
    Conclusion
    I hope you found these motivational tips helpful for getting through hard times.  They come to us all and you just have to keep going. I sometimes picture Atreyu struggling to get through the Swamp of Sadness in the Never Ending Story. It feels like that sometimes but you don’t want to let yourself be swallowed up like Artax. You have to keep going.  You’ll get through it and you’ll be stronger.  Of my favorite when times are tough quotes that I shared above, my absolute favorite is the one from Mary Anne Radmacher. Tomorrow is a whole new day! 
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    Making Career Exploration For Elementary Students Fun

    Planning a career isn’t high on most children’s priority list. Still, most children dream of an exciting future. As parents we get the chance to plant and nurture the seeds of ambition that can help big childhood dreams blossom into lifelong passions. Career exploration for elementary students shouldn’t be a chore. Use these simple tactics for harnessing the power of a child’s imagination and making career exploration activities fun. This should be about kids being exposed to lots of good career options so that they can naturally be drawn to the one that is right for them. Here are five fun ideas for career exploration for elementary students.
    It is important to recognize that it is ok for children to change their minds frequently about what they want to be when they grow up. My daughter wanted to be an artist, a fire fighter, a paleontologist, a rocket scientist, a statistician, and now she wants to be an engineer. My son wanted to be a trash man, a football player, and now he wants to be a video game designer.
    Inspire Your Child Through Career Exploration For Elementary Students

    1. Career Exploration Games For Elementary Students
    Play Games That Role Play Careers. Young kids love role play games like doctor or veterinarian or cops or restaurant or court of law. These games are fun for kids and these role play games show that they are starting to thinking about what various jobs do.
    Try Video Games. It’s no secret that casual video gaming can become addictive – so why not let kids learn while they play? Whether a child dreams of becoming a pilot, a fashion designer or a world-class chef, there’s a game that’ll teach the basics. And thanks to the widespread success of the “freemium” business model, most of these games are free to try – making it easy for young dabblers to explore all sorts of topics to their hearts’ content. In fact, even a passion for video games themselves can lead to a well-paying career.
    Board Games. There are so many board games and they can provide exposure to all sorts of careers. CLUE may give your child an idea of what a detective does. Madame President may help your child understand what a politician does. Monopoly helps kids see what a real estate baron does. There is even a board game called Careers.
    Games can serve as excellent indicators of where a kid’s heart is.
    2. Provide Real Heroes
    Comic-book superheroes are more popular than ever before, but the pages of science and art books are filled with their own inspiring tales of real-life crusaders. Helping a child relate his or her personal quirks to, say, young Picasso’s struggles against the artistic establishment, or to Bill Gates’ high-school obsession with computer tinkering, doesn’t only set the bar high; it serves as a reminder that it’s OK to stand out from the crowd. Real life role models or heroes show that hard work and persistence can turn even the wildest dreams into realistic plans of action.
    One way to provide real heroes like these is to discuss the ones you hear about in the news. Another is to read biographies about famous people written for children. Kids love reading together and it will be fun to see what parts interest them the most.

    I think this was when my daughter first decided she wanted to be a fire fighter when she grew up!
    3. Encourage Career Investigation
    At some point, every parent gets tired of answering that endless barrage of “what?” “how?” and “why?”. That’s why it’s crucial to give kids the tools they’ll need to investigate their questions on their own – from basic search-engine savvy to critical and lateral thinking skills. Not only will these problem-solving tactics prove useful for school research projects; they’ll foster an inquisitive mindset that’ll naturally draw kids toward fields that interest them. What’s more, a nose for investigation comes in handy in any career, from corporate accounting to nuclear physics.
    4. Join a Group
    No matter what a child’s passion is, there’s bound to be a group of other kids interested in the same topic. Beyond school clubs, organizations like the National Association for Gifted Children and Boys and Girls Clubs of America offer seminars and field trips for curious youngsters. And there’s nothing stopping high-schoolers from signing up for local meetups of creative writers or computer programmers or trail hikers. Don’t worry too much if a group isn’t explicitly career-oriented – hanging out with like-minded hobbyists will still help boost a kid’s confidence and skill. Besides, a little networking practice never hurts! Skill focused summer camps are also a great idea.

    5. Integrate Work and Play
    As the old saying goes, “If you love what you do, you’ll never work a day in your life.” In other words, work feels like play when it’s fueled by a genuine desire – to achieve a milestone, to express an idea, or to understand the world more fully. World-class athletes, artists and scientists succeed because their work is an integral part of their day-to-day life; left to their own devices, they’d still be doing what they do best. Bring this attitude into a child’s life, and all the other pieces will fall into place naturally. Help kids to see what careers match their natural talents and interests.
    If they like dinosaurs talk them about what a paleontologist does. If they like animals, talk to them about what a vet does. Read books together about the things that interest them.
    Conclusion
    Career exploration for elementary students is just about showing them different career options. You are showing them that there are lots of doors available so that they can open one of those doors someday. As a child, I didn’t even know there was such a thing as an engineer so I didn’t even know that was a career choice. This phase of career exploration is just about opening their mind to possibilities. As your child begins to chose a career that interest them, don’t forget to encourage your child to dream big and work to reach their goals!
    What are some of your favorite career exploration tips for kids?
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    Sports For Kids And How To Encourage Your Young Athlete

    Sports for kids are an important part of growing up.  Young athletes are learning more than just good exercise behaviors.  Here’s why sports are good for kids and how to encourage sports in youth. Don’t worry, there are lots of sports for kids to get involved in so there is a sport for every child.

    Sports For Kids
    Fall Sports include: Football, Golf, Cross Country, Rifle, Cheer, Crew
    Winter Sports include: Basketball, Swimming & Diving, Wrestling, Hockey, Skiing, Ice Skating, and Bowling
    Spring Sports include: Crew, Lacrosse, Baseball, Soccer, Track & Field, Tennis, Shotgun 
    Summer Sports include: Beach Volleyball, Frisbee Golf, Surfing, Skateboarding, and Biking
    And you can probably still think of more sports for kids which are hard to break down by season such as gymnastics and dance. The point is there are so many ways to get your child active and involved in a team.  See what they gravitate towards. They might need to try several option before they find where their natural talent and interests lie.

    Kids First Sports
    Some of the most popular options for kids first sports are tee ball, flag football, soccer, and basketball.  My son and daughter both started with tee ball and soccer.  Then my son progressed to flag football, basketball, cross country, and track.
    Why Sports Are Good For Kids:
    Sports are a great way to get physical exercise for children and according to Kids Health that is so important to building strong bones and muscles. Because sports are fun, they make exercise fun and ensure that it happens. Besides building strength, endurance, and flexibility, kids will be getting aerobic activity which is great for their heart and lungs.
    Sports for kids offer so much more than just physical fitness benefits though. Kids will also be working in groups, developing social skills and a concept of being part of a team. They will be learning how to be lead and what makes good role models. Sports for kids help them build self-confidence and find a tribe where they belong. They will learn what defeat feels like and what winning feels like. Kids will learn that winning takes effort and practice. That is just a few of the reasons why sports should be encouraged. There are so many benefits of team sports!
    How To Encourage Sports In Youth:
    Even with all these reasons why sports are good for kids, you may still have a child who can’t seem to find their niche or just doesn’t feel athletic. Here is how to encourage a child in sports.
    As a parent, sometimes we want our kids to be the best and well, he just isn’t. That is OK. They don’t need to be the most athletic child on the team to still be benefiting from the sport. Your child needs your support and encouragement to succeed.
    That kids who seems like a natural probably has had a lot of encouragement for a long time. I mean both in terms of the parent actively practicing with the child and showing approval and pride in their efforts. Here’s how you can do that too.
    Do you understand how your young athlete receives love and encouragement? In 2007, Dr. Gary Chapman wrote a book called The Five Love Languages.  His premise is that every person has one love language that speaks more loudly and deeply to him or her.  The love languages are: physical touch, words of affirmation, quality time, giving and receiving gifts, and acts of service. To your child, one of those speaks of your love more clearly than the others. Determining which love language, will help you communicate encouragement to your child in a way he truly hears. It will allow you to effectively communicate your support for your young athlete in a way that will make him feel proud and inspire him to keep improving.

    PHYSICAL TOUCH
    Some athletes respond to a hug of excitement after a good game or a hug of consolation after a bad one. Do you know if your child is one of those?  Mine weren’t. Hugging was the last thing they wanted from me after a game. My job was not to take that personally and to find out what they did want from me.  If your child is a hugger, then by all means, hug them before, after games, and often in between.
    WORDS OF AFFIRMATION
    Maybe your athlete only needs to hear he did a good job. He worked hard. He is improving. He’s a leader on the field. If words of affirmation are his love language, then be frequent with your encouragement, avoiding fluffy flattery and focusing on words that are sincere and heartfelt.
    QUALITY TIME
    Some kids just want your undivided attention. They want you to play catch with them, shoot baskets with them, take them to the batting cages, and of course, come to their games. Spending quality time with them is enough to fill their love tanks.
    GIVING & RECEIVING GIFTS
    Parents are tempted to speak this language almost exclusively because it’s easy. But the fact is, some kids do not feel loved by the gifts showered on them. Although gift giving is not the love language of all kids, for some it speaks loudly of love.  A new bat, sports bag, glove, basketball. A volleyball net in the back yard. Or think outside the norm and hide small gifts in their lunch or sports bag. When a youth athlete knows his needs are met above and beyond, he feels loved.
    ACT OF SERVICE
    As our kids grow, we strive to teach them independence. They learn to wash their own clothes, help with chores, make their own lunches, clean out the car.  This is as it should be.  When we know that our child’s love language is acts of service, we should’t feel we are robbing them of their chance to learn independence when we serve them. When we do acts of service as an expression of love with a caring attitude, rather than a duty, we are communicating love.  Go ahead, wash her uniform for her while she does her homework. Clean her room while she’s away on a team trip. Make her lunch when she’s had a rough night of practice. Not all the time of course.  Acts of service are gifts and we don’t have to give gifts all the time.
    Our young athletes need to receive love in all five languages, but focusing on the primary love language of your child will fill his love tank much quicker and more effectively. This means your encouragement will really sink in.
    Conclusion
    There are so many sports for kids to become involved in. Try a few different ones to help your child find one they enjoy. There are so many reasons why sports are good for kids and it worth the effort to get them involved. Make sure to practice with your child when possible. Encourage youth in sports to help them reach their potential.
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    Family Goals Worth Setting

    You set goals for your personal achievements, goals for your work, and goals for fixing up your home so why wouldn’t you set goals for your family? Goal setting is a great practice that keeps you aiming higher and achieving more. It is hard to get somewhere if you don’t know where you are going. Family goals are worth setting because they help unite everyone under a mission and provide a roadmap for how to get there.
    Family life can be stressful and overwhelming if the whole family isn’t being supportive of one another. Everybody is moving in different directions, doing their own thing, making their own plans; when do you find time to take care of what matters most, your family? That’s were family goal setting can come in to help make sure everyone is playing for the same team.

    What are Family Goals?
    There are two types of goals you can set as a family. You can set goals for things you want to do together like how to spend family nights and vacation time. Or, you can set goals for how you want to work together as a family. For instance, you can create a goal to give everyone the same amount of screen time so there’s no more arguing over whose turn it is at the computer.
    Setting family goals requires the cooperation of the entire family to be successful.
    Why Family Goals are Important
    Happy families don’t just happen by chance, they take work, focus, healthy habits, and decision making. As the parent, it is your job to guide your family and create a loving and supportive home. While everyone participates in reaching the goals, the goals originate with your decisions about what you want for your family.
    Once goals are created and everyone’s on board with working together, it creates a family bond that builds trust, love, and respect.

    How to Set Family Goals
    Setting goals doesn’t need to be difficult, but it does require some decision making about what’s important to you. Your family goals should reflect your family values.
    1. Decide What You Want for Your Family
    This is a time to come together as parents and decide what you want for your family. What do you want to achieve together over the next several months, the next year, the next few years? These goals can have an end result like “we want to take a cross country road trip” or be ongoing goals like “we want our children to show each other respect.”
    2. What Would You Like to Copy or Avoid
    Think about other families you know, or even families you watch on TV, what do they do that you want your family to do as well. What do they do that you want to avoid? Look for examples of things you like or don’t like in other families and set your goals accordingly.
    3. What are Your Challenges as a Family
    Where do you see your family struggling? What do you wish your family did better? The answers to these questions will help you define goals that you want to set.
    4. Don’t Forget the Most Important Goals
    Keeping your family bonded, healthy, and happy should be at the top of your family goal setting. Be sure to set goals that include fitness, healthy habits, encouragement, appreciation, gratitude, and being social together.
    Family Goal Setting Worksheet
    You may also find this Family Goal Setting worksheet helpful, you can print the pdf here or pin the image below for later.

    Family Goals Examples
    These family goals examples may inspire you in creating your own goals. Use these examples to get you started thinking about things that you want to achieve as a family.
    1. Be Active in Your Church – attend weekly services and participate in church events.
    2. Deal with Conflict – set a goal that will help your kids work through conflict resolution in a mature and responsible manner.
    3. Create a Family Financial Plan – that includes savings, investments, education, travel, etc. You might like to use this family financial plan workbook to help you.
    4. Generate Sufficient Income – fights over money can lead to family stress and divorce so this is an important goal. Come up with ways that you can easily increase your household income and reduce spending.
    5. Maintain Open Communication – when your kids feel safe telling you anything, they’ll be more truthful and open with you.
    6. Work/Life Balance – set a goal of the maximum hours you’ll work in a day or a week to give you work/life balance.
    7. Family Health and Fitness – how will you work together as a family to eat healthy and stay fit.
    8. Family Night– set a goal to make sure you have at least one family night a week where you do something fun together like watch a movie or play a game.
    9. Family Meals– set a goal to enjoy a certain number of meals together as a family without any distractions.
    10. Extended Family Time– decide what works best for your family according to where people live. Maybe a monthly get together would be a nice goal or a yearly vacation if they are far away.
    Conclusion
    Family goals are a great way to create a solid foundation for your family. Working together will build mutual respect and trust as well as a strong family bond. As your kids get older and they can participate more in helping to reach goals, the family goals will evolve and change. That is a wonderful part of the process to watch the growth as you move from accomplishing small goals together to taking on larger challenges.
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    How To Have A Family Meeting [Template Included]

    A family meeting is a great way to keep your family bonded. You can discuss family rules, upcoming events, and share information that everyone needs to know. But unless you have a family meeting agenda, everyone will be off-topic and not paying attention, making it a big waste of time. That is why I have included a family meeting template here to help make sure it stays productive.

    Why Have a Family Meeting?
    Most importantly, it puts everyone on the same page and the whole family will know the same information. No one can say “I didn’t know” or “Nobody asked me”. No excuses! If there’s a new house rule, chores, vacation being planned, or an event everyone has to attend, the family meeting is the time to share. This way you can make sure everyone knows what’s going on and expected of them.
    Family meetings are also a great bonding tool for your family because everyone has the opportunity to connect and share. It reminds everyone that their family is there to support them and help them.
    Additionally, family meetings teach your kids important life skills. By being exposed to the challenges of parenting, kids can learn what the real world is like and how to deal with their problems in a productive way. Meeting as a family can teach communications skills, problem-solving, planning, conflict resolution, and even budgeting.
    Lastly, family meetings help your kids build their confidence as they learn to speak up for themselves. This regular scheduled meeting time gives your kids the opportunity to say what they think and express how they feel without judgement or punishment.

    How to Have A Family Meeting
    1. Set a regular day and time. This will help everyone know when they need to be present, no exceptions. They can mark it on their calendar for a regular time and day each week. 
    2. Keep it positive. Help your family stay focused on the positive. Ask your kids to share something good that happened over the week.
    3. Moderate, but don’t control. As discussion run off-course, you might need to reign your family in and keep them focuses, but don’t control the entire conversation. Let everyone participate with their own thoughts and ideas.
    4. Give everyone a chance to run the meeting. Taking a leadership role will help your kids build self esteem. Allow them to take turns calling the meeting to order and going through the family meeting agenda. I have provided a family meeting template below that you can print and use as your weekly agenda.
    5. Don’t make it all business. In addition to the important family stuff, having something fun in the agenda will keep your family engaged. Create a fun family tradition for the meetings or have a fun question everyone has to answer at the end.
    6. Post reminders. If you make new rules or discuss future plans, be sure to write them down and post them where everyone can see as a reminder of what was discussed.
    7. It’s okay to have a difference of opinion. Not everyone will agree, but finding a compromise can make everyone feel like they got something they wanted.
    Family Meeting Template Printable

    The image version of the family meeting template is above or you can use the pdf version.
    Hosting regular family meetings, making them fun, and encouraging your kids to participate, will help build their confidence while also creating a family bond.
    If you haven’t already planned your first family meeting, get out your calendar and get add it on there. It’s a great way to bring your whole family together!
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    List Of Helpful Self Esteem Activities For Kids

    Self-esteem is very important to cultivate in children. Having self-esteem not only helps in sports, but also in school, personal relationships and eventually in the workplace. Building self-esteem is not as simple as flattery. Self-esteem is something we earn, not something we are given. To this purpose, here is a list of self esteem activities for kids.
    Effective Self Esteem Activities For Kids

    First- “What is self-esteem?” Some people equate self-esteem with confidence, but that’s only part of the equation. While good self-esteem in kids comes from being confident in their abilities, there are other factors – such as awareness, respect for others and a drive to succeed. We want our kids to have good self esteem because that means they have a good sense of worth and self-respect.
    A good self-esteem will help them be happy in life and succeed in their endeavors. You know that saying, “We only accept the love we think we deserve.” Well, if we don’t hold ourself in high esteem, we won’t push for the healthy relationship, the better job, or whatever it is that makes us happy. At the same time, learning self respect should come with learning to respect others so that you get a person with high self esteem but not one that is arrogant or overbearing.
    List Good Points
    If you find your child talks themselves down, help them learn to talk themselves up. Help them recognize their good qualities and traits. Wendy Lynne, the Director of Mental Toughness Academy,  suggests kids can begin to build confidence by focusing on their positive qualities when they feel down on themselves. If they say something like, “I’m not good at anything.” You might respond, “Well that isn’t true. You are good at lots of things. Tell me 3 things right now that you are good at.” Help them come up with things they do well like help their friends, help with chores, being kind to others, etc.”
    Also, side note to parents: If your child criticizes him or herself excessively, make sure they aren’t picking up that cue from the way that you treat yourself. Everyone should cut themselves some slack, even you!

    Build A Child’s Self-Esteem By Teaching Them To Help Others
    Is there a child in your kid’s class or team who doesn’t perform as well as they do? They have to work harder to learn things or simply don’t have a natural talent at doing those things your child does really well. We need to teach our children that instead of putting them down or going out of their way to avoid them, one of the best things they can do is offer to help them.
    If the child is having trouble with a certain skill, have your child offer to help by going over the drills with them so they can get better. By helping their team members, they’ll not only be building their own confidence, but their self esteem will also skyrocket from having improved someone else’s abilities.
    Likewise, if your child is struggling with something, encourage them to ask their coach or friends for help. Being able to go to another adult is a very important life skill to acquire.

    Try a new sport!
    Encourage Your Child To Get Out Of The Comfort Zone
    I once knew a kid who was great at playing the goalie on his soccer team. Nothing got past him. His teammates loved him, because they knew that they could focus on their own positions and he made them look good. He was full of confidence and self esteem that carried over into every aspect of his life.
    One day, the coach decided to change things up during practice and made him switch positions with one of the midfielders. The midfielder was very confident in his own skills, and thought that he would have to work less because all he would have to worry about was tending the goal.
    The goalie, in is new position, was showing signs of doubt and felt intimidated because of how much of the field he had to cover in his new position. As the practice game went on, one goal after another was scored, while the all-star goalie stood in the middle of the field, too intimidated by his own mind to move around.
    When the coach blew the whistle for a ten minute break, something totally surprising happened – instead of the usual name calling that would come with missed goals and bad plays, the goalie and the center midfielder got together to trade information and pointers on how to play their new positions better.
    When practice resumed, fewer goals were scored and the goalie was now zipping around with much more confidence in his new midfield position. It turned out to be a great way for the kids to gain self-esteem doing something out of the ordinary and not being afraid to go to others for help.
    Likewise, trying a completely new sport or activity may challenge your child in a new way or even help them find a talent they didn’t know they had. The growth mindset is a key part of trying new things and overcoming set backs. Going out there and doing something out of their comfort zone, stretches them and helps them believe they can reach higher.
    Try Positive Affirmations
    Positive affirmations can help your child develop their self-esteem and sense of optimism. Grab your free printable poster of positive affirmations for kids at natastahl.com. She also shares lots of great tips to make saying affirmations part of your family’s daily routine!

    Kindness Rocks
    Using some creative play on words, you child can add a bit of cheer to someone’s day with these simple fruit painted kindness rocks. This activity mixes several self esteem building opportunities together- they get to either try their hand at an artistic endeavor or they get to show their skill. Either way is a win. Plus, being kinds to others is a quality they can be proud of giving out these kindness rocks is sure make everyone’s day! Visit sustainmycrafthabit.com for the full tutorial.
    Learn New Skills
    Learning new skills, especially ones that help develop a sense of independence, certainly helps build self esteem. We all like to know that we are capable of caring for ourselves if need be. Teaching kids skills like cooking and doing their own laundry can help them feel more confident and capable. Here are some tips for teaching kids how to become more organized. Organization can help them feel more prepared and it can even help improve their grades.
    Conclusion
    I hope these self esteem activities for kids help your child to approach things with a growth mindset and feel confident despite setbacks and failures. If they learn how to give other people respect and help, as well as show a willingness to learn there will be no obstacle that can stop them for long.
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