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    4 Types Of Toxic Relationship & Their Warning Signs

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    Toxic relationships are difficult to define. As no two relationships are the same, there’s no one set of symptoms that clearly define an unhealthy relationship. However, the difference between a healthy relationship and an unhealthy one is often how it makes you feel. Luisa Williams from My Family Psychologist explains more.
    The negative impact of a toxic relationship is significant, affecting both physical and mental health. While healthy relationships have a foundation of trust, independence and respect for each other, unhealthy relationships often lead to feelings of low self-worth, a lack of agency, as well as feeling helpless, fearful, anxious, and often paranoid.
    The term ‘toxic’ doesn’t only refer to romantic relationships. It can apply to any kind of connection you make with another. An unhealthy relationship with a friend, a family member, or a co-worker, can be equally damaging to your well-being, but the most common signs that these relationships are toxic may vary.
    The signs that a relationship is toxic can accumulate over time and often the boundaries are blurred making it difficult for some to identify. However, if you’re drained by your relationship and your partnership isn’t equal, you might be in a toxic relationship. Signs that your relationship may be toxic:
    Toxic relationship: Friend

    They cross your boundaries

    If you have a toxic relationship with a friend, they might constantly do things that upset you or make you feel uncomfortable. Whenever you try to bring them up and set a firm boundary, they might become defensive or make you feel bad for wanting space. If they apologise, the apology rarely sounds sincere.

    They never listen to your problems

    While they might frequently come to you for advice, they don’t devote equal attention to listening to your problems. Whenever you need them, they appear busy, and every conversation tends to be about them.

    They can’t be happy for you

    Instead of celebrating your victories, they see you as competition. Your every achievement reminds them of their own shortcomings and means they feel they’re being left behind.

    They’re judgmental

    Instead of offering you mental support, they frequently judge your choices and make you feel bad for making them.

    You feel drained

    If the friendship feels suffocating and one-sided, chances are it really is. When your friend isn’t there for you when you need them, you end up feeling lonely and unsupported.
    Toxic Relationship: Family

    They compare you to other people

    No matter what you do, your family member is never satisfied. Somehow, you are never good enough while other people can do no wrong. If you have siblings, you’re often being compared even if you’re completely different people.

    They’re always right

    They always think they know better and treat you like you’re incapable of making your own decisions.

    They dismiss your feelings

    Rather than being empathetic, they’ll often simply tell you that other people have it worse or that you should be grateful for what you have. You aren’t allowed to feel unhappy and express any negative emotions.

    They pick on you

    They frequently make personal or critical comments about you. They might give you backhanded compliments, for example, “You look so pretty with makeup on, you should wear it more often” or “Are you sure you want to eat that?”.
    Toxic Relationship: Coworker

    They act superior

    A toxic co-worker might act like their role is more important than yours. Even though you might have the same duties, they feel superior and enjoy telling you what to do. Nothing is ever their fault, and they think they’re always right.

    They gossip

    They might frequently talk behind people’s backs, enjoy spreading doubt and deliberately turn colleagues against each other.

    They can’t work as a part of a team

    They struggle to cooperate because they want to look better than everyone else.

    They complain a lot

    More than venting about the odd bad day at work, toxic co-workers are never satisfied. They will regularly talk about how much they hate their job and feel every piece of constructive feedback is a personal attack. It becomes draining and can quickly causes discontent to spread.
    Toxic Relationship: Romantic Partner

    They have issues they aren’t willing to work on

    The key to a healthy relationship is mutual respect and growth. If your partner isn’t willing to work on themselves, they aren’t able to fully commit to the relationship. For example, your partner might have anger issues and throw things when you’re having an argument. They might not be abusive towards you but make you feel uneasy and unsupported.

    They can’t, or won’t, communicate

    Instead of talking things through openly and honestly, a toxic partner might disguise their feelings by giving you the silent treatment, lying, or becoming passive-aggressive. These manipulative tactics allow toxic partners to express their resentment or disappointment, while denying your opportunity to respond or express your feelings. This can leave you feeling misunderstood and isolated.

    Controlling behaviours

    Toxic partners often assert control over others using a range of behaviours including humiliation, intimidation, threats, and violence. They may isolate you from your friends and family, seek to control your finances, and monitor your time and whereabouts. This pattern of behaviour is often subtle and gradual, becoming apparent all of a sudden.

    The effort isn’t equal

    Your partner is emotionally detached and disinterested, unwilling to invest any effort or time into your relationship. They are always the priority. You’re always the one initiating plans, and the one who always texts or calls first. You feel you have to work hard just to sustain your partner’s attention, but your efforts never pay off.
    If you have recognise any of these behaviours or you have concerns about a relationship, it’s a good idea to seek help by speak to an experienced professional.
    If you need help and support understanding a toxic relationship you can contact My Family Psychologist, who offer specialised counselling services for adults, couples, and children as well as mediation services.
    Family Law Advice
    If you are in an toxic relationship and would like advice on your legal situation, please do contact our Client Care Team to speak to one of our specialist lawyers.
    Other Helpful Contacts
    National Domestic Violence Helpline – 0808 2000 247
    The Men’s Advice Line, for male domestic abuse survivors – 0808 801 0327
    The Mix, free information and support for under 25s in the UK – 0808 808 4994
    National LGBT+ Domestic Abuse Helpline – 0800 999 5428
    Samaritans (24/7 service) – 116 123 More

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      How to better connect with other people

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      After over a year of profound social changes that have significantly reduced the opportunity for meaningful interaction, it’s not difficult to see why some of us have forgotten the art of connecting with other people. 
      Here, Psychologist Luisa Williams gives us top tips to increase connection and explains the multifaceted benefits of sharing better bonds with other people.
      We are all social creatures that crave interaction. But what we truly need is connection – a genuine bond with someone that goes beyond spending time with them and enjoying their company.
      When we connect with someone, we feel a sense of belonging that improves our well-being. Positive relationships with people don’t only make us less lonely but also increase life longevity and build our resilience. Connection helps us feel supported and more resistant to life adversities.
      But, if it has so many benefits, why do we find connection with others so difficult?
      An inability to connect might stem from low self-esteem. When we think lowly of ourselves, we’re afraid of being vulnerable enough to share personal struggles with others. A fear of vulnerability might be linked to trust issues. If you were hurt in the past, it’s natural you don’t believe in other people’s intentions.
      In some people’s cases, it’s a matter of a different worldview. If you experience mental health difficulties such as depression, anxiety, trauma history or personality disorders, you might feel isolated and struggle to relate to other people and their perspectives.
      But no matter what’s holding you back, you can learn how to better connect with others, and begin to enjoy the benefits of connectivity. Check out the tips below:
      Connect with a smile
      Smiling is one of the tricks that make others see you in a positive light. It conveys positive emotions and boosts your mood. When you smile at someone, they’re more likely to respond with a smile as well, which strengthens the bond and positive associations. Essentially, smile is a social tool. It lets others know you want to engage with them and that you’re someone they can trust.
      Practise social skills
      We all need social interaction, whether we’re lonely or not. However, problems arise when we turn to other people to receive validation or distract ourselves from negative emotions. Sometimes, we end up seeing our relationships as a transaction. In the end, we fail to commit and make an effort. If you want to build a true connection with others, you have to start seeing them as someone you can grow with.
      The first step is to become a great listener. Good listening skills let others know you care about what they have to say and that you’re interested in them as a person. Make sure you’re actively listening – make eye contact, respond with nonverbal cues and wait for a pause to ask questions about what is being said.
      If you struggle with concentration, visualise what the other person is saying. Make a mental note of what they like and dislike. It will help you get to know their boundaries and further strengthen the bond. If you know what’s important to someone, you’re less likely to jeopardize your relationship. Don’t forget to engage in small talk. It will allow you to showcase your personality and encourage building on the relationship.
      Get to know them
      Be present and forget about distractions. When you want to get to know someone, you have to make an effort and focus all your attention on them. Make sure you don’t look at your phone or worry about all the things you have to do when you get home.
      Develop interests. One of the most important steps is sharing mutual interests. Your likes and dislikes might be already obvious to you but if your life revolves around school or work, you might struggle to think of things you’re passionate about. Of course, most people enjoy watching TV or playing games but the key to building a relationship with someone is finding something you can both grow doing. You can start by trying out new hobbies. Make a list of your strengths and weaknesses and consider signing up for a new class.
      Lastly, learn to recognise when they feel uncomfortable or upset. Pay attention to their body language and changes in demeanour. Notice if they’re exceptionally quiet or struggle to keep eye contact.
      Don’t be afraid to be vulnerable
      Vulnerability. It’s defined as ‘uncertainty, risk and emotional exposure’. Most of us take risks frequently: we order food from a new restaurant, we cross the road when the light is red, and arrive late for work. But when it comes to people, we tend to play it safe. We hide our feelings and distance ourselves.
      Vulnerability is the price of connection. Connection is about stepping out of your comfort zone and being open with another person as much as they’re open with us. If someone shares their personal struggles with you, don’t be afraid to respond with the same.
      However, make sure you connect with yourself first. Try to sit with your thoughts and feelings. Write them down and try to link emotions to what’s going on in your life. This will help you spot a pattern and better meet your needs. For example, if your job is stressing you out and you don’t have time to rest because you work overtime, you might think of adjustments to complete your tasks faster.
      Be authentic and let people get to know the real you. If you find it difficult to open up and feel comfortable around someone you don’t know well, remind yourself that everyone has flaws. Write down your strengths and make sure you read them regularly. Finally, don’t be afraid to ask for help. A genuine friendship is based on trust and helping each other get through difficult times.

      If you’d like to hear more from Luisa on a range of other topics, visit My Family Psychologist. More

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      in Relationships

      Why am I so angry?

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      Luisa Williams, CEO & Founder of My Family Psychologist, joins us to share insights on anger responses and how to recognise when recurring anger may be caused by more persistent underlying problems.
      Why am I so angry?
      Life is full of twists and turns. Its challenges sometimes force us to change direction or adjust to a new reality which includes dealing with difficult emotions. If we don’t get the job we want, we might feel disappointed. If our relationship ends, we might experience pain and sadness.
      Anger is an emotion some of us experience frequently. It can be triggered by being disrespected or treated unfairly. It might be triggered by unexpected situations that interrupt our goals. Or, it can be a response to stress. Imagine you’re late for work and stuck in traffic. This would make anyone at least slightly annoyed at a given moment. When anger is a response to an unpleasant situation, it likely comes and goes quite quickly without causing further issues.
      While anger might seem like a straightforward emotion that’s an interpretation of whatever is going on in your life, it often implies there’s something else hidden underneath the surface. If you find yourself dealing with anger on a daily basis, your anger is likely a part of a bigger problem.
      Unhealthy responses to anger
      While anger is often a natural response, it can easily escalate and turn into an emotional outburst or even aggression. When our anger is triggered by the words or actions of other people, we might struggle to feel understood and take out our frustration on others to avoid being hurt more. Unhealthy anger can take on many forms:
      Passive aggression
      Have you ever given someone a silent treatment because they made you angry instead of trying to talk things through? Have you ever pretended everything was fine when you were upset about something your loved one did? Passive aggression is a strategy that helps us avoid confrontation but only adds to the problem. While we might choose not to fully engage with anger to avoid being vulnerable, suppressed anger doesn’t go away and can turn abusive. When you act in a passive-aggressive way, you place your needs and pride above other people’s feelings. Your refusal to communicate increases frustration on both sides and makes you feel even more hostile.
      Open aggression
      Just like passive aggression, open aggression is a harmful way of expressing anger but it’s directly aimed at other people. It’s a way of confronting someone while disregarding their feelings. Examples include shouting, throwing things, sarcasm or violence. Releasing anger might feel powerful. It might make you feel in control while serving as protection that shields you from further getting hurt. But in reality, it puts a barrier between you and your loved one and hurts both of you.
      Turning anger inwards
      Anger is often intense and might be triggered by the way we feel towards ourselves. When someone lets us down, we might blame ourselves for trusting them and having high expectations or believing we were good enough. If anger is mixed with the feeling of guilt and shame it might be used as a form of punishment. For example, you might self-inflict an injury to deal with overwhelming emotions.
      If you tend to deal with anger using the strategies above, you may struggle with self-control and expressing emotions in a healthy way. Anger aimed at yourself decreases your self-esteem. Anger aimed at other people shows disregard for their feelings and needs. It might make communication difficult. It might escalate and lead to undesired behaviours. It doesn’t only strain relationships with other people but can cause a range of health issues such as headaches, hypertension, insomnia, anxiety and digestion problems. Additionally, when we feel angry our body releases cortisol (the stress hormone) that increases our heart rate and blood pressure, triggering a ‘fight or flight’ response. This causes inflammation and stress.
      Anger and mental disorders
      Anger can be connected to many other emotions like guilt, shame, anxiety, stress, feeling overwhelmed and irritability. It might be also related to underlying mental health issues some of which are described below.
      Intermittent Explosive Disorder (IED)
      IED is marked by explosive outbursts that occur suddenly and often not in proportion to the situation. These might include verbal aggression, shouting, getting into fights, threatening, or assaulting others or property damage. The episodes are often marked by increased energy, racing thoughts, tingling, tremors, palpitations, or chest tightness. The cause of IED is unknown but the risk factors can be a history of abuse or having another mental disorder that is characterized by disruptive behaviours.
      ADHD
      Attention Deficit Hyperactivity Disorder (ADHD) is a condition which symptoms include inattentiveness, hyperactivity, and impulsive behaviour. People with ADHD experience emotional dysregulation which makes it difficult for them to manage emotions and keep their intensity appropriate to the situation. The main risk factors for developing ADHD can be genetics, low level of activity in the brain parts responsible for attention and activity or prenatal exposure to alcohol or nicotine.
      Personality disorders such as BPD
      Borderline Personality Disorder is another disorder associated with emotional dysregulation. Individuals with BPD struggle to manage intense emotions which often seem an inappropriate response to a situation. Explosive anger experienced by someone with BPD is one of the diagnostic criteria and might be accompanied by shouting, aggression and even self-harm. The main cause of the disorder is a history of trauma or exposure to distress as a child.
      Conduct disorder
      Conduct Disorder is a pattern of antisocial behaviours in children that might involve property destruction, theft, deceptiveness, animal cruelty and aggression towards people. Children and teenagers with conduct disorder misbehave frequently and find it difficult to manage emotions. The possible causes include defects or injuries to certain brain areas linked to regulating emotions and behaviours, genetics, and a dysfunctional family environment.
      If you feel like your anger is impossible to manage and takes over your life, we recommend seeking professional help.
      Contact My Family Psychologist for a confidential chat. More

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      in Relationships

      When a narcissist meets an echoist…

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      We have all heard of the narcissist. In fact, I have written an article recently on how to identify if you are married to one on this blog.
      Throughout my years advising clients I have encountered many cases where the narcissist behaviours of one party have dominated the whole relationship leading to an unhappy and unhealthy marriage.
      But what of the people married or in a relationship with a narcissist? It’s time to meet the echoist; not an officially recognised condition but a term that was popularised in the 2016 book Rethinking Narcissism by Craig Malkin and is gaining momentum.
      Now, I shall start with the caveat that not all echoists are in relationships with narcissists. That would be too simplistic. However, the two personality types are intrinsically linked.
      What is an echoist?
      In a nutshell, an echoist is the opposite of a narcissist. Consider the following statements:

      Narcissist: Look at what you did wrong? The narcissist copes by blaming everyone else.Echoist: What did I do wrong? The echoist copes by blaming themselves.

      An echoist is someone who puts everyone else’s needs and feelings first and at the expense of their own. People pleasers, they cannot bear praise and hate being the centre of attention. They don’t like to talk about themselves but are great listeners. They blame themselves when things go wrong regardless of where the fault lies.
      All in all, a perfect mix for a narcissist who will seek out (consciously or subconsciously) people that verify their importance and allow them to dominate with minimal return required. A narcissist may often arrive on the scene as the rescuer, but this never plays out to be the case.
      However, an echoist is not a doormat. Smart, intelligent, kind and warm-hearted people, they are often more emotionally sensitive and aware than others. They are the ones that always pick up on a bad atmosphere in the room or an underlying argument.
      Many people root the development of echoist behaviours forming in childhood with a dominating narcissist parent or family member creating a learnt behaviour that they must repress their own feelings to be loved; that they must give everything and accept very little back. Imagine a parent that erupts over the smallest of things and it is never their fault. In the end, you would learn to anticipate the situation and change your behaviour to avoid it.
      Echoists and relationships
      An echoist can easily get stuck in an unhealthy relationship where they feel unworthy, unlovable and everything is their fault. This can quickly cause anxiety, depression and loss of hope as they struggle with connection and expressing their needs.
      They can easily lose their voice, their sense of self. I have seen many clients at the start of the divorce process that try to take up as little space in the world as possible, ask for as little as possible and put themselves at a very long line of other people.
      But it can change, and I have seen the results myself.
      New beginnings
      Before I turn to what can be done I would like to express that if you are in an abusive relationship you must seek help immediately. I have detailed some useful links at the end of the article.
      Counselling can certainly help here. An echoist needs to start to understand feelings and feel them – not fear them. Emotions such as anger and resentment are all perfectly normal emotions. By accepting them, you learn to voice them and start to develop more equal relationships where you can say you are not happy and ask for things.
      An echoist also needs to learn to question situations and break the default that it is all their fault, or they are too sensitive. Ask yourself what am I getting from this relationship? Why is it making me feel sad or lonely? Healthy relationships create a space for vulnerability.
      You can unlearn bad habits with professional support, time and the desire to break the old relationship patterns to get your voice back.
      If you are affected by anything in this article the following websites are useful resources:
      RelateWoman’s aidThe Echo Society More

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      in Relationships

      How to tell if you are in a co-dependent relationship

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      Luisa Williams, CEO & Founder from My Family Psychologist joins us on the blog with her advice on how to tell if you are in a co-dependent relationship.
      I can’t live, with or without you. U2’s famous song appears to strike a chord with many of the couples that I have worked with in therapy. The saying ‘can’t live with or without you’ is a struggle faced by many couples. 
      You can’t help who you fall in love with, but when does a relationship become more than an intense emotional and physical connection and border into the co-dependency zone? Do you know when that line is crossed?  
      It can be hard to distinguish between a person who is ‘clingy’ and a person who is co-dependent. If you suspect that you, your partner or somebody you know is displaying traits of being co-dependent or that you/they may be in a co-dependent relationship, here are some signs to look out for. 
      (You don’t need all of them to determine whether you or your partner is co-dependent or whether.)  
      Ten tips on how to tell if you are in a co-dependent relationship
      1. You or your partner may exercise the need for control.  
      Control helps co-dependents feel safe and secure; and to be honest, this is not specific to them.

      We all want to feel like we are in control of situations but there is a difference between being in control of the situation and being a dictator of somebody else’s life which is a violation of somebody else’s boundary. 

      Sometimes you may not feel like you have control, and that can make you feel like you are being controlled. Co-dependents also need to control those close to them, because they need other people to behave in a certain way to feel okay. 
      2. There may be addiction issues.  
      This is not true for all co-dependents, but there may be some form of addiction which generally acts as a means to help them relax or to add a sense of order or purpose to their lives. Whether that be substances, alcohol, cigarettes, working or cleaning, this can help them not feel out of control.  
      3. You may love the person, but don’t like them.
      This may feel like a contradiction in terms, but it is possible to feel love for somebody but not like the things they are doing or how they behave towards you. This can lead to a sense of feeling trapped or unable to leave. 
      You need to think about whether the positives outweigh the negative. Work on what isn’t going well and decide how you can work on this. Sometimes it will work out and other times, it won’t. What you risk doing when staying with a person whom you love but don’t want to be with, is resenting that person which is not a feeling that is felt lightly.  
      4. You or your partner may experience low self-esteem.  
      If you or your partner is experiencing heightened feelings of low self-esteem or feel like you’re are comparing yourself to others, then you may find yourself trying to be comforted or comforting your partner. 
      Underneath this veil of low esteem, there may be an underlying issue which is causing this feeling. If everything is going well, you won’t feel bad about yourself and the self-esteem issues should not be there.  
      5. There are poor boundaries in place or a lack of boundaries.  

      Imagine boundaries as being invisible lines which exist between you and your partner. 

      Having boundaries is important to establish the values of relationship, but this also includes your feelings, thoughts and needs. 
      This is where co-dependents can get into trouble as they tend to blur the boundary lines and may expect their boundaries not to be crossed, meanwhile overstepping other people’s boundaries. Sometimes, co-dependants can become defensive as a result of having poor boundaries.  
      6. There is a lot of ‘people-pleasing’ going on. 
      Saying ‘no’ causes anxiety to co-dependants, and they will go out of their way to sacrifice their own needs to accommodate others. 
      If you find it difficult to say no to situations and people and feel responsible for others unhappiness or turmoil, then this is only going to cause issues down the line when eventually it will become too much to handle on your own. 
      You need to focus on yourself, and if it is impacting your happiness, then you may need to evaluate the situation and not compromise yourself. You may also find little or no satisfaction or happiness in life outside of doing things for the other person. 
      7. There feels like a constant push and pull when communicating and interacting with each other.  
      At times, co-dependants have trouble when it comes to communicating their thoughts, feelings or needs to others. This can leave the other person trying to guess what is going on, and it will come as no shock that people are not mind readers. 
      Often you may be afraid to be truthful because as the old saying goes, ‘The truth hurts.’  You might find yourself pretending to be okay with something to appease the other person or find yourself compromising your own beliefs so that it does not cause upset. 
      You or your partner may threaten to leave but then change your mind. Communication can become confusing and dishonest when you try to manipulate emotions or feel like you are being manipulated out of fear.  
      8. There may be anxiety, obsessive or paranoid behaviour within the relationship.  
      You or your partner may experience thoughts about the relationship or believe that things are happening within the confines of the relationship without any evidence. This is caused by anxieties, fears and dependency about what the relationship means and how it could be destroyed. 
      There may be fears about infidelity or being hurt by the other. You or your partner may find yourselves questioning whether the relationship is a mistake and may find yourself lapsing into a fantasy about how you would like things to be as opposed to what they are.  This is to avoid the pain you may feel in the present and keeps you in a state of denial. They won’t reach out and have trouble receiving. They are in denial of their vulnerability and need for love and intimacy. 
      9. There may be fears of rejection, abandonment and emotional unavailability. 

      Co-dependants need people to like them and want to be around them.

      They fear that they will be rejected or abandoned by people close to them, and this may stem from childhood attachments styles and previous experience in relationships. Because of the weak boundaries, they fear that they will be judged, rejected, or left.
       On the other hand, you may fear being smothered in a relationship and losing your autonomy. You might deny your need for closeness and feel that your partner wants too much of your time; your partner complains that you’re unavailable. 
      Some people find it hard to be by themselves for long periods of time and require constant reassurance. This trait makes it hard for them to end a relationship, even if that relationship is abusive. There is a real risk of co-dependants feeling trapped or potentially making the other person feel that too.  
      10. You feel burnout or not do anything you used to enjoy doing  
      It is natural in a relationship to compromise as long as both parties agree to this. You may feel like you or your partner tend to get their own way with decision making (whether that be music or films to watch). You may find that you don’t do any of the hobbies or things you enjoyed doing before you got into the relationship or feel that you can’t do them anymore. 
      You may feel obligated to spend all your free time with your partner. You may start to feel worn down or exhausted with the relationship and might tend to agree just so there are no arguments. You may start to neglect other important relationships. This can impact your sense of personal identity and might make you question who you are if you enable this behaviour to continue.  
      How to change a co-dependent relationship  
      It is important to reassure you that anyone can become co-dependent and you are not abnormal if this happens to you. It is important that you do not punish yourself or your partner but seek support to get the relationship back on track if you feel that this is the right thing to do moving forward. If you decide to part ways, that is also okay and you should not feel guilty if this is what you decide.  
      Breaking up isn’t necessarily the best or only solution. To repair a co-dependent relationship, it’s important to set boundaries and find happiness as an individual.  
      A few things can help in forming a positive, balanced relationship: 

      People in co-dependent relationships may need to take small steps toward some separation in the relationship. They may need to find a hobby or activity they enjoy outside of the relationship. 

      A co-dependent person should try to spend time with supportive family members or friends. 

      The enabler must decide that they are not helping their co-dependent partner by allowing them to make extreme sacrifices. 

      Get in touch
      If you feel like you are or have been in a co-dependent relationship and feel like you may benefit from some support moving forward, then get in touch with My Family Psychologist. 
      We offer different individual therapies as well as relationship and couples therapies. This could be the first step towards a healthier relationship with yourself and your partner. 
      Visit the My Family Psychologist website here.
      Family law advice 
      If you would like any family law advice please do contact our Client Care Team to speak to one of our specialist family lawyers here. More

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      in Children

      Is my child ‘normal’?

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      Luisa Williams, CEO & Founder from My Family Psychologist joins us on the blog with advice for any parent who has asked the question, is my child ‘normal’? I have rarely met a parent who has not at one stage, wondered if their child or their development was ‘normal’.  And no doubt, many of you […] More

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      in Children

      When should I introduce a new partner to my children?

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      Making the decision to introduce a new partner to your children can be difficult. You may have a concern about upsetting your kids, worry about your ex-partner’s reaction or the impact on your new relationship. All of these are common and natural concerns.  It can be difficult to gauge the right approach to take, but […] More

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      in Relationships

      I agree with Sally Challen: education is the key to dealing with domestic abuse

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      Dealing with domestic abuse: Regular readers of this blog, and indeed regular followers of national news, will be aware of the Sally Challen case. Mrs Challen killed her husband Richard in 2010, by striking him repeatedly with a hammer. She was subsequently convicted of murder and sentenced to life imprisonment with a minimum tariff of […] More